Demi Lovato ... Long is the Way

“Long is the way and hard, that out of Hell leads up to Light.”

            Milton, Paradise Lost.

This line from John Milton’s epic poem is nowhere more applicable than when addressing mental illness … be it alcohol addition, drug addiction or eating disorders.

Society cannot “see” a mental disease. X-rays can only show broken bones to reset. Blood tests can show cancer cells in certain organs. Objective tests can show the level of plaque growing in the aortas of our heart. However, we cannot “see” that silent screaming going on in the head of a person suffering from a mental disease. That road is truly rocky and beset with peril. Since we cannot objectively “see” the origination or medical manifestation of mental illness, society has a tendency to downplay its importance or deadly nature. And yet, it comes for us regardless of age, race, socio-economic status or sexual orientation.

It even comes for our heroes and celebrities. Today in the United States, the media spotlight on actors, singers, and athletes is mind numbing. For some reason, when issues of the day arise, the leering press scrambles to obtain a quote from these people. And mainstream society tends to hang onto their every word believing that they may find … wisdom … insight … clarity of the soul?

Foundations, corporations and charities fall over themselves in the race to obtain an appearance or sponsorship from a “celebrity” at an annual event knowing that that person’s appearance, and mere mention of that particular charity or foundation will result in increased attention to their cause. The thousands, or millions of people suffering from whatever disease that cause happens to address are almost after-thoughts. The “celebrity” shows up at the event, the entity hosting the event, after heavily marketing that celebrity is ecstatic, the “celebrity,” having been prepped by their handlers, says a few nice words, stays for some photo opportunities and then moves on.

This mindset is even greater if you can find a “celebrity” to become a spokesperson for your cause. Imagine the money which would be raised for eating disorder research if Brad Pitt, Matthew McConaughey or Tom Brady stood up and spoke out with intelligence and passion about how deadly eating disorders are.

But, what do we do when the person who is the face of our “cause-célèbre” falls? In the most recent case of Demi Lovato, the leering press has been focused on an apparent heroin overdose requiring her hospitalization. The sole emphasis has been on the apparent overdose and her drug addiction. Society seems to have a grasp on that issue.

And yet, Ms. Lovato is perhaps the most well known “celebrity” who suffers (present tense) from eating disorders. To her credit, she has been open about this disease. She recently released a song entitled “Sober,” which admitted her fall from abstinence. One of the stanzas is particularly enlightening:

“I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know why
I do it every, every, every time
It's only when I'm lonely
Sometimes I just wanna cave
And I don't wanna fight
I try and I try and I try and I try and I try
Just hold me, I'm lonely”

These very words could very well have been written in the journals which are usually kept by many people suffering from eating disorders. Nonetheless, the leering press remains focused on the drug issue. Not surprisingly, they are missing the true story. It is not the relapse on the drug issue which should be of concern. The reality is that Ms. Lovato’s eating disorder has her in its insidious grip. The relapse into drug use is just its most recent manifestation.

We need to look no further than Ms. Lovato’s own words. In an interview published in October 2017, that publication revealed:

“Now, Demi says that while she’s gained control over her former drug addiction, disordered eating is still a struggle for her. “I don’t want to give it the power that it controls my every thought but it’s something that I’m constantly thinking about,” she says. “Body image, what I wish I could be eating, what I wish I could be eating next, what I wish I didn’t eat, you know it’s just constant. I get envious towards people who don’t struggle with an eating disorder because I think my life would be so much easier.” [emphasis added]

Counselors and eating disorder professionals believe that when a person is in the grip of their eating disorder, certain parts of the brain engage to impact behavior and conduct. There is a weak sense of self, they believe that something is wrong with them, they do not fit in. They feel different. They think of themselves as an outcast. So their eating disorder convinces them that by changing their appearance, or by losing themselves in a haze of drugs, that will change how they feel about themselves through dieting, bingeing, purging and will “fit in.” The starvation and purging behavior, the drug use are believed to negatively impact the levels of protein in the blood and the neural circuitry related to how they perceive themselves and others. And the deadly cycle continues.

For those schooled in eating disorders and know it to be the insidious disease it is, they are painfully aware that the drug usage and overdose are the symptoms. However, the leering press will ignore this reality since drug overdoses are “sexier,” easier to understand and make far better headlines.

Eating disorders are truly hell for those suffering from this insidious disease. No amount of celebrity or money in a bank account insulate you from its deadly reach. Ms. Lovato’s road to recovery will assuredly be long, hard and arduous … made more so by society’s refusal to acknowledge or understand this disease.

I do pray that Ms. Lovato finds that road … the Army of Warrior Angels can wait.